Reasons Why People Fall Out Of Love

Love is a primal emotion that all humans possess, like an instinct. Even though it comes naturally to humans, it takes more time for some people to warm up to love than others. For some people, it’s easy to fall in love, while others find it hard, but in the end, we all experience some form of love at some point in our lives. Just as it is easy to fall in love, it is also easy to fall out of love.

When the flame of love burns out, the need to make sense of the situation consumes us, and we keep playing with what happened in our heads. It’s more like the detective in us takes over, and we want to know whose fault it was if we did our best and if we are enough just the way we are.

If you’re trying to figure out what went wrong and why you and your partner fell out of love, then here are some pointers for you to run your story by and determine why your loave did not survive.

Unrealistic expectations

One of the most common reasons people fall out of love is that at the start of the relationship, couples feel a sense of bliss and euphoria. However, as the relationship progresses and becomes more mature and realistic, things start to change. We begin to notice qualities of our partners that we dislike and didn’t notice earlier due to the euphoria of an early relationship or unrealistic expectations like, “He/She is perfect”. Once the illusion of a perfect partner is destroyed, it leads to disagreements and conflicts in relationships and, in turn, can make people fall out of love with their partners.

Unsatisfying sex life

Unsatisfying sex life is a critical driving force behind most relationships’ failure. It could, in turn, lead to the loss of intimacy in the relationship. In addition, some people fall out of love with their partners because they are unsatisfied with their sex life. However, in most cases, sex life can make or break a relationship because of its importance, especially to married couples.

Less time spent together

Another common reason for failed relationships is that some couples neglect to spend time together. Spending time with your partner and having personal conversations with them is very important. You get to share little physical contact, give words of affirmation and make your partner understand their worth in the relationship. When couples don’t spend time together, they drift apart and fall out of love.


This is when one or both individuals pay very little attention to their relationships compared to other aspects of their life. Many people tend to de-prioritise their relationships because of personal goals and become complacent. They fail to understand that they should prioritise their relationships with their partners as much as they prioritise their personal goals and ideals. The failure to do this usually leads to a failed relationship.

Absence of honesty

Honesty in a relationship is very crucial. It is non-negotiable if any relationship plans on surviving for long. Honesty is the best way to build trust, so once dishonesty becomes the order, trust breaks down irreconcilably. Honesty in a relationship is a two-way traffic of parties being honest and making the environment conducive for honesty. No matter how hurtful the truth will sound, parties must be willing to say it and accept it when it is said to them. Taking the truth does not mean you are okay with the hurt it is causing. In fact, express anger and pain if it makes you feel better. Parties that only want to hear what is pleasing to them end up with partners skilled in lying to them.

Unresolved conflicts

Sweeping conflicts under the carpet always sounds easier than confronting them. Nobody wants to go through the moment of tension, so issues keep building up until the root is buried deep down. However, when addressed as they come, conflicts help teach partners about themselves and boundaries. Resolved conflicts strengthen the core of love, while unresolved conflicts make couples lose interest in each other.

Physical and emotional distance

With a combination of physical distance and an emotional disconnect, falling out of love is a long time coming. It usually starts little with both parties building up a coping mechanism of nonchalance and, before you know it, nagging flying here and there or parties investing their energy and resources in things other than their relationship.

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