Do you miss your ex and want them back? Have you gone through a series of other relationships but feel like your ex is the one meant for you? These are familiar and valid feelings.
True love is a beautiful feeling. If you are in love, nothing else would matter to you more than the satisfaction, well-being, and happiness of your partner. On the contrary, heartbreak leaves you in despair, sad, disappointed, weighed down, and wishing you’d forever remain in the life of that person who you sincerely loved.
These make moving on really difficult. You can relate to this if you’ve ever fallen in love. You’d realize sometimes you just want your ex back because the feeling of love cannot be permanently erased and your souls are tied.
Humans generally have shortcomings and it takes compromises to make a relationship last. However, this is not an excuse for toxicity or any form of verbal abuse or domestic violence. So, if you end your relationship on the basis of any form of abuse, it will be better not to go back no matter the tricks employed by your ex.
There’s no formula for a successful relationship but there are ways you can attract your former lovers back into your life. This is for those who want their exes back into their lives.
Before we take a look at how you can get your ex back, let’s take a look at the signs that reveal it is possible to reunite with your ex
signs you can get back with your ex
Infidelity, disloyalty, poor communication, and lack of commitment among other things have undone a lot of relationships. regardless, a lot of broken relationships are reparable if the parties involved become intentional about their relationship.
Even after breaking up, some people find it really difficult to get into another relationship. They miss their exes and are unable to get them off their minds. There are always pointers that show your ex could be the right person for you. In fact, some people become better humans after a breakup and if they ever get back to their exes, they exhibit their best versions.
Below are some signs that you have a high chance of getting back your ex.
1) Compatibility And Chemistry
There are people you meet and it feels like they’ve been in your life forever because of the chemistry and compatibility between you two.
If after meeting a couple of people after a break and you realise your ex is just perfect for you in terms of compatibility, it is a no-brainer that you people can be back and better. I must say that it is not easy to find someone with whom there’s always a spark.
2) Intangible Cause of Breakup
Cheating, verbal abuse, physical abuse, lies and other vices have ended a lot of relationships. If any of the aforementioned reasons cause a breakup, it becomes difficult to salvage the relationship because of the difference in core values. On the contrary, if you break up for reasons like distance, poor communication and lack of attention, you will likely be able to salvage your relationship.
3) Breakup circumstance
Let’s assume you broke up with your ex because you had to move to another city and a distance relationship isn’t your thing. Chances are that you will come back together if, within a short period, work or a different circumstance brings you two together in the same city.
People who break up because of circumstance would continue to harbour feelings for each other and at every given chance, they can reignite their affair.
Now, let’s take a look at how to re-attract your ex again.
How To Make Your Ex Attracted To You Again
1) Figure Out the Cause Of the Break-up
Chances are that you are responsible for the breakup. A lot of people who exhibit toxic traits are unaware that they have such traits. But if you are aware of your toxic tendencies and you are deliberate about growth, you would ensure that you treat your partner very well if you are back with them.
Figuring out the cause of a breakup will ultimately help you to avoid the same incident in the future.
2) Forgive and Absolve Yourself of Any Guilt
In the instance where you are responsible for the breakup, you’ve got to forgive yourself because humans are liable to make mistakes. If you do not forgive yourself, you may never feel worthy of the love of your ex.
Forgiving yourself opens you up to the possibility of a fresh start. You know, nobody is perfect and everybody deserves a second chance.
3) No Contact Period
Do you know why a lot of people return to their exes after a breakup and have romped with them? They miss the friendship, partnership, and kind of love they were given by their former lovers. Some people would offer friendship after a break-up but that’s a recipe for further trouble and disrespect.
So, it is better to stay in your lane and go missing for as long as possible. If you were good to them and you do this, they’d realize your worth and possibly come to the conclusion that you’re the best person for them.
4) Do Not Indirectly Talk About Your Ex Partner Via Social Media Posts
Resist the temptation of making posts on social media that indirectly calls out your partner. Even if they left the relationship, it is best you take all your complaints off a space where they are likely going to see it. If you do so, you’d appear as the weakling who is just trying to garner attention and pity through negativity.
Regardless of how you feel, it is best you deal with your situation personally. This will make your ex hold you in high esteem as it is childish to post negativity about your past relationship on the internet. The internet is a hub of strangers, nobody really cares about you.
5) Take a Good Time Off Relationship
Just as it takes time to build a loving relationship, it also takes time for love to fade. If you jump into another relationship without properly getting healed, chances are that you’d be the toxic one in the new relationship which may not even last.
Jennifer broke up with her man of six years and just a few weeks later, she started posting pictures of her new man on social media and always tagged it “Fresh Start”. Maybe she thought it would get her ex jealous. It was obvious that she was not focusing on herself but on her ex. That relationship did not last long because she did build the relationship but jumped into it.
It is best you get busy after a breakup. Go back to school, hit the gym, read more books, and engage in more productive relationships, this way you’d become even more attractive to all who have ever truly loved you.
6) Make New Friends
Do not stay put and be waiting for your ex to change their mind and message you for make-up. Get on with life, meet new people, and aim to add value to the lives of your new friends because you have become a new version of yourself.
You’ve got to start doing the things you fantasize about. You can take a trip to a place that you’ve never been to and then, take pictures and publish them on your social media pages. The idea of travelling and posting pictures is not because you want your ex to see them, but because you want to be happy and attract other people into your life.
Your ex may notice and start thinking that they miss you, this is the pros of this action.
8) Reach Out To Talk
If you have decided to get back your ex, you have to make a move to make it happen. An honest conversation between you two can reveal what you need to do to get back together again. From the discussion, you can have a fresh perspective on what led to the breakup. You may also talk about alternative solutions to fix your relationship problems.
More importantly, you find out whether they feel the same way you do. Based on the conversation, if they appear interested in getting back together, you’ll see the signs.
9) Find Out If They Still Care About You
Your ex might not be completely over you either. If your ex-partner shows they have a soft spot for you after a break, there’s a huge chance that you guys are still attracted to each other. Is your ex still getting in touch with you? Friendly communication can indicate there’s a possibility that they want to stay active in your life. Do they occasionally act jealous or make moves to make you jealous? Be mindful of their actions and what they post on social media.
On a date with your ex?
Growth is key to making a relationship long-lasting. If you try to get your ex back and he/she discovers that you have not grown in any way, chances are that they won’t fancy taking you back into their life again. The better you are, the more attractive you become.
So, if you get a chance to meet with your ex-lover again, there are things you can do to appear very attractive, thus:
- Do not get cosy but focus on just having fun.
- Forget about your feelings and keep mute over them.
- Resist the urge to talk about getting back together as an item.
- Avoid PDAs even if they try to be clingy.
- Appear calm and patient.
- Don’t say you miss them.
- Don’t ask if they are in a relationship.
The aforementioned rules would seem like you are not desperate about getting back with them because desperation can turn off anybody. If you follow these rules, there’s a huge chance that the feelings they had for you would be rekindled and they might start talking about getting back together.
When some people get a chance to have a date with their ex, they get carried away and begin the relationship talk. You cannot do that because you want the attraction to be natural, not that you are coercing them to take you back. The main focus of any date with your ex should not be to talk about your past but just to hang out and have fun as though a romantic relationship never existed.
Everybody abhors pride, so when your ex reaches out to you and you want them back, you should respond appropriately and make it work. If there are demeanours or treatment that you meted at your ex while in the relationship, you must outgrow that sort of behaviour to make the new relationship work.